Monthly Archives: January 2013

The Cry of a Woman – Being Misunderstood

In my previous blog post I shared some pretty heavy insight about “The Cry of a Woman” that some of us as women may be able to relate to and hopefully that some men can grow to understand or perhaps be sensitive enough to care. When a woman cries from that place in her most inner being it’s not an easy place to just bounce back and jump back on the saddle of life and start galloping away like nothing never happened (although most times it is the case because all choices have been exhausted)! One of the hardest things to conceptualize is “being misunderstood”. People often say they’re not judging you when that may not necessarily be all true. There are a lot of things I said I couldn’t see myself doing (that I saw someone else do and disapproved of) until I was placed in the same or similar situation. Trust me, the story is completely different once on the inside! Deep down you just wished someone understood. What I have grown to understand through my own personal experiences is that everybody can’t handle “your” truth because it comes with a hefty price of “being misunderstood”.

Allow me to share one of the greatest misunderstandings that have always been placed over my head like a mistletoe with flashing lights: “You don’t have any children so you don’t have to…” Yes! I felt like I was under the gun because of not having a child so I often felt ridiculed for it. My heart would sadden and there would be a cry deep down inside because if only they knew my heart’s desire was to one day be a mother and share in the joy I’m often reminded of when it comes to children.

In this life we understand there is joy and pain that we experience in different seasons of our time here on earth. As a woman, when I cry I realize that I not only cry for myself but for the little girl inside that was exposed to things that shouldn’t have been seen through the eyes of a child. I also cry for the woman who fears that if she sheds one more tear that it would send her over the edge and she’s holding on to the last strand of hope. I cry for the one who’s story hasn’t been told yet everyone “else” can tell you all about her. If we but truly understood God’s grace that covers us because if all that we have done was exposed for all to see…who would cry for you and who would cry for me?

Ponder that…stay tuned!

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The Cry of a Woman

The cry of a woman is like that of no other. It is distinct and heavily weighed. Have you ever cried to the point of exhaustion? Have you ever cried to the point where your wail turns into a whimper because just when you think you’re all cried out…there is yet more? Whether you have experienced a lost of a loved one and/or the heartbreak of broken trust or betrayal…the cry of a woman engulfs the heart like a volcanic Tsunami! The feeling of drowning in one’s own ocean of heartbreak makes chances of survival seem despairingly obsolete.

Some may say, “you’re just too emotional” or “you have to put your emotions in check” but at that time you barely know how to bring your breathing under control and comprehend any form of reality. It’s like having an “out of body” experience because you become disengaged with what was once an active, vibrant life of “your normalcy” to now having your entire world flipped, turned around, and dismantled right before your eyes! Let me walk you through this metamorphosis:
•Physically: palpitations of the heart, nervousness, headache, swollen eyes from crying, stuffy and runny nose, stomach and back in knots, lump in your throat, hyperventilating and pure exhaustion. •Mentally/Psychologically/Emotionally: Comprehension of events seem surreal and is on automatic rewind in your mind. Sensitivity is on high alert. Caged inside for defense protection because everything and everyone “seem” suspect. You wonder in your thoughts, “how am I going to survive THIS?!” Numbness settles in, autopilot operation has kicked in, shut down transaction is now in progress. Emotions now turn “ill” motion because your heart (mind) and body (actions) are operating without your permission. Your thoughts are scattered and your once articulation of conversation has turned into the language of “Scooby Doo”.

Can I just keep it real with you? So before the suggestions of “pray to Jesus, go on a fast, and quote scriptures” start rolling in (while it should be the order of operation) I have to share my “reality” according to the book of Gina – Chapter One. I often shouted, “God, where ARE you? Can’t you see what’s going on??” I prayed and cried and rolled out scriptures expecting a supernatural miracle to take place and all my sorrow to be gone. Ha!! Right! Let me tell you what it did eventually do…as I continued the process of praying, crying, reading and reciting God’s word it drew me closer to Him even if my situation never changed!!

Now I know I shouldn’t leave you hanging like this so just tune in for part two…

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Just as Good!

Have you ever gone to the grocery store and needed to pick up a few canned goods? Whether you’re stocking up the pantry or preparing a meal, it’s always good to have a few canned goods on deck. Have you ever experienced picking up a canned item and find that there are a few dents in the can so you put it back on the shelf? Sometimes, those dented canned goods are placed on lower shelves and people will stretch to the highest shelf for that “perfect can” when what they are looking for is right within reach and “just as good”!! After all, what is important is what’s on the inside of the can, right? Hmm…

There have been times when I’ve felt like the can with a few dents along the way but with something good and valuable on the inside. But like the can, I have been dropped many times either on accident or by the careless act of someone else, and as a result, once the dent is noticed back on the shelf I go. Hoping the next time I am picked to serve my intended purpose. Some may refer to the term as “damaged goods” but isn’t that an oxymoron or is there a glimpse of truth hidden inside the metaphor?

I may have different “ingredients” and perhaps not one that is preferred by most but what I do know is that everything that God made was good! Perhaps my presentation is flawed or perhaps I stayed in one place too long and began to blend in with the other “cans” on the shelf because of being misplaced, mishandled, mislabeled, and misunderstood.

Little do they know, I’m right within reach and “just as good”…

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